The holidays have been really busy and wonderful. I pray all of you have had a wonderful time, of celebrating the coming of Christ and all that this event has ment to all of us, as well as some real family time that builds memories and builds value into the lives of your loved ones.

I am a little late with this post because of the busyness, so please forgive me. I trust this will be a blessing to someone who needs what God has provided here, and you will be uplifted and encouraged to be who God has called you to be.

“Dwayne Allen wasn’t a bad kid, just one drifting in the wrong direction. In practical terms, he had no father. Allen had spent his middle school years in alternative school in Fayetteville, N.C. There were no sports, only brushes with authority and occasional suspensions.

So it was reasonable for Allen to be wary when Terry Sanford High School’s first-year football coach, Wayne Inman, cut him off in the hallway one day early in Allen’s freshman year.

Inman asked Allen’s name. He asked if Allen played football. Told no, Inman excused himself for a moment and returned with a $10 bill. He stuffed it in Allen’s hand.

“Buy yourself a bag of dope,” Inman told Allen, “or spend it on a physical and come on out for football.”

Allen quit drifting that day.

“Changed my life,” the rookie tight end said Friday in the Indianapolis Colts locker room. “Changed my life.” “

This quote appeared in a story this week about the Colt’s rookie tight end Dwayne Allen . What a great example of how one man can step into the life of another  and completely change the outcome of his life.

This is exactly the point we are trying to make with this blog, exactly the kind of transformational behaviour we are hoping to instill into the men who read this blog, and want to make a difference, especially Christian men trying to figure out what the man God has called them to be looks like.

Mentor leadership is not about being perfect, none of us are. It is about investing ourselves into the lives of those men around us to do everything we can to help them become better at being men. From a Christian viewpoint….more like Christ.

Mr. Allen’s life could easily have ended like many from his background, young men with no father at home, or a father that is lost in his own world of addiction or self-destructive behaviours that were passed to him, in most cases by his father. He could have gotten caught up in drugs, gang activity, that can sometimes substitute, in a negative way, for missing leadership from a missing  father. He could have missed out on such an incredible opportunity as an NFL player, and he could have continued the vicious circle of absent T father and helped to  create a whole new generation of young men to do it all over again.

One man’s actions, not asked for, not sought out by Mr. Allen, by simply stepping onto this young mans life,  yet so very powerful, anyone of us could do easily. We just need to look around to see the need. Look within your family, look in your neighborhood, look around at Church, just because a young man is a christian does not guarantee things will all turn out alright. I recently took a poll at the prison where I have the privilege to preach and teach and out of a group of 40 inmates nearly all were professing Christians, some of them were Christians who grew up in Church and still find themselves waking up each morning behind bars…

Men of God awake!!!

I understand the grind. I had a family of 6 to provide for and the only way I knew how to do that was to work a lot of overtime, 60 and 70 hrs. a week of overtime. That can be very hard on the family, especially if your relationship with God is not what it should be. It requires teamwork with your spouse and doing things when you are very tired and burned out. I have been there. It was not fun, and without God’s help, that is, looking to and leaning on God’s help, success can be allusive.

The fact is you can not do it alone. You need other men of moral character in you life, men of all ages and experience that can be a resource to help guid and advise when you are lost in the day-to-day grind.

Early on in our country it was not uncommon for two, tree,  or more generations to live in the same house or on the same property ( no I am not quite that old ) giving the men of the family, other men of varying age and experiences to help each man develop into the man he would become.

Today families are spread all over the country, if you are lucky there is a father-son relationship that will help the young man develop and build character into his life. Personally I have two brothers, one in South Carolina, one in Indiana. they each have a son and now their sons are starting families as well. We seldom see each other, and the boys have lives of their own as well so we see each other even less. I have followed news of them through the years but there are very large gaps from their youth, years that would go by without interaction. The evidence says, that for many of us, the key is being intentional about keeping in touch with the men of our families. We have to make a little time to send a word of encouragement, or to challenge them when they need to do better. It’s all about priority and taking control of our time, and challenging our own character to be the man God has called us to be.

Recently my Uncle Willie passed away. Again there was a long distance between us. We would take a family vacation almost every year, travel to Ohio and visit family there. My mother had many brothers most of which lived in the same area, but only one sister. Uncle Willie was her husband.

When we found out Willie had an aggressive cancer and only had about 6 mos. to live, it was tough. We all love him. “He is our rock ” was a phrase I heard many times as the family shared their grief over the inevitable. Next to my own father Uncle Willie was the other dominate male influence in my life. All of my uncles are unique and have added to my character, but Uncle Willie was special. Maybe because we spent more time there because of the relationship between sisters. ( Mom and Aunt Hellen ) maybe it was my cousin Richard, Willies son and about my age, but my heart tells me it was the stature and character of my Uncle Willie that made such an impression on me. I could go on and on about the man he was, a christian, a loving husband, a big man cut and strong, yet his favorite pastime as I remember was gardening and working with plants and flowers. He would spend one on one time with my brother and I each time we were there. He did the same with my sons, and I would be willing to bet with all the young men in his circle of influence. God had put Aunt Helen and Uncle Willie on my heart not two weeks before the news of the cancer, and I had gone for the weekend so see them. Among my last memories of Him are the two of us sitting in his Sunday School class sharing about the Lord.  He set an example for me to see just what a Godly man looks like. That image did not pass with him but in some ways has found itself in me, in Richard who has stepped up and taken on his fathers responsibilities in the family.

That is the kind of legacy I want to leave behind. one that lives on in the men my life has touched. One that carries the gospel forward into the next generation and reproduces itself in the next generation and on, until the Lord returns. One that teaches men how to get back up and finish their race even if they have fallen and are far behind the others.

So how can you take back your time and begin to structure an intentional, balanced effort to reach out to the ones God has already put on your heart?

Is it worth the effort?

When will you begin?

This is a New Year, a time for retrospect, self-examination, new and renewed commitment.

What will you do now, to embody the MAN God has called you to be???